Our son Scott came to visit us here in Boot Key Harbor in the Florida Keys. For some reason, all Scott's friends believe that we are pirates. This is a truth we will neither confirm nor deny. Because it's against the law. Confirming or denying isn't against the law, being a pirate is against the law. Unless of course you're in politics, are rich, or well connected. Which we aren't.
This isn't going well so far, can I start over?
Scott took this picture of me - it says so in tiny letters beneath the photo. He asked me to take off my glasses for the photo because he doesn't think I look much like a pirate in tri-focals.
This is Scott. Notice the family resemblance? I think it's the hat. This is his first time at the helm of a dinghy. He's doing pretty well for a neophyte pirate, don't you think?
Here's the pirate ship, at anchor in Booty Key Harbor. It's really Boot Key Harbor, but Booty is more fun to say when you're a pirate. Or a degenerate. I admit to neither. You'll have to judge for yourself.
The first evening of Scott's visit he wanted to see a sunset. I guess he doesn't have them where he lives which is California. Or maybe they just go to bed early, because of the time difference. I'm not real good with all that geography stuff. That's Saltwater Suzi's bailiwick. I don't know what a bailiwick is either, but it's fun to say. I kind of got off the track there, this is Sister's Creek which runs between Boot Key Harbor and the Atlantic ocean. We had to go there because that's where they keep the sunsets.
Underneath a dock, but overneath the water we saw an egret. Scott thought you might like to see it, too. So he took this picture for you. He really is a good kid - in spite of having pirates for parents.
If you look carefully you can see the Atlantic Ocean from here. Just a small portion of it, really. I don't want to exaggerate.
Just as I promised Scott, we got the dinghy out to the Atlantic Ocean side, and saw a sunset in progress. Sunsets are required here. It's a law. And it helps sell a lot of alcoholic beverages.
There are probably mermaids in that water, but we didn't see any.
We took pictures of the sunset without a dinghy...
and with a dinghy. Because we feel our viewers should have options. You can choose the one you like best. If you select the correct one there may be prizes. And you could win big. I mean really BIG. But I doubt it.
As the sun slunk slowly in the west (this time) we took a final picture just to document that these things really do happen. This is a real sunset. Or actually a photo of a real sunset. Do you think I drink too much rum?
So we turned around and went back up (or down, it's hard to tell because the current keeps reversing) Sister's Creek.
Back into Booty (hee hee) Harbor and back to our pirate boat where we had a dinner that couldn't be beat. But we were. So we went to bed and slept through the night. You'll have to take my word for it, there are no photos.
The next day, having little else to do, we got up, had breakfast and Scott, feeling very piratish, took this photo of our mooring lines and anchor chain and bow pulpit and foredeck. I hope he comes up with a better name for this photo than that, cause it's kind of too long. You don't have to read this stuff you know, but I'm obligated to write something between the pictures.
Now is when things start to get exciting. (I wish there could be some really cool music to go along with this blog, but there isn't, so try to imagine.) We launch our true colors, and look real fierce which is hard to do with sandals, bermuda shorts and a Hawaiian shirt. But I think I pulled it off, don't you?
We untied the mooring lines and left the harbor. The weather was quite calm as you can tell from this photo. I'm trying to lull you into a sense of complacency so you will be really surprised when all the excitement starts. Oh, and it does, it really does. NO SKIPPING AHEAD!
Scott relaxes as I take the helm and gently motor out of the harbor. You may wonder where Suzi is all this time. She's taking the pictures.
Scott just relaxed, and watched the world go by, completely unaware of the events that were going to unfold. (This is all literary stuff, to build the tension and help hold your interest.)
This is what Scott was seeing in the previous picture. It's a restaurant. And a bar. And a filling station. And they charge $3.98 for a gallon of gasoline. Scary, huh?
We passed right by those gasoline selling bandits (the real pirates, these days) and headed toward the opening in the Seven Mile Bridge. Yes, it is really that long. Otherwise they couldn't call it that. Complete subject change. Did you ever have one of those dreams when stuff was happening and all of a sudden, you're in a completely different place and different stuff is happening, seemingly without explanation?
My life is like that. Suddenly, Scott and I were sitting in a bar and each was suspicious that the other was trying to steal his beer.
Then, suddenly, Scott was no longer looking suspicious. He looked happy and inexplicably not thirsty.
And suddenly, I was back on board the boat, on the Florida Bay side of the bridge and raising the sails.
Hey, I don't make this stuff up. You can see it all for yourselves. Photos don't lie.
So we sailed, and life was beautiful, and the sky was blue with puffy white clouds... and then, and then...
we were suddenly surrounded by a pod of vicious dolphin.
For those of you who are still holding your breath waiting for the horrible thing that was going to happen, and it seems not to have happened yet; didn't you think that $3.98 for a gallon of gas was scary enough?
Then it rained for the rest of the day, and the next. And we took no photos because it was just too depressing for photos. But then the day after that, and what a day it was, we went to Key West. But you'll just have to wait to read about it, because as I write this it hasn't been posted yet. If you're reading this after it's been posted, well, ignore what I just said. You've been ignoring it right along anyway, if you've got the sense the Good Lord gave you.
STAY TOONED FOR KEY WEST!